FISA/What would Lucy think? a parody

Hello friends, I’m your Foreign Intelligence Surveillance Person,

Are you tired of government, run-down by worrying what it’s going to do to you next, listless as your apathetic congress people?

Do you poop out at parties when you casually tell people their phones are being illegally being tapped?

Are you unpopular for making endless phone calls to mindless interns in Washington who really don’t know what FISA stands for?

The answer to all your problems disappeared in this little bottle today labeled the new and approved Foreign Intelligence Surveillance Act.

Foreign Intelligence Surveillance Act contains Spying on your Telephone, your E-mails, your Cell phones, and anything else they can dream up.

Yes, with Foreign Intelligence Surveillance Act you can now breathe a sigh of relief. All you do is take a great big second thought before you do anything now.

Mmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm. It’s such a tasty concept too.

Tastes just like candy!

Hey Barrack, Remember that day job? You know, that one you still get paid For!

Mr. Obama,

I hate to be the one to remind of this fact as it seems to have slipped your quite busy mind and schedule these days, but sir you still have a day job that we the very people you intend to have vote for you in a very short time are still paying your salary. And will all due respect sir you at this point in time are doing one miserable job.

If as you claim will all your fabulous plays on words with your talented moving speeches and claims of "change", why then as the current new "leader" of your party have you not been at the helm of your party assisting in putting this disastrous new FISA bill back under some hidden rock where it belongs.

You sir, could have, indeed should have been fore and center leading the debate if not a full filibuster demanding that this bill, both parts be sent back to the drawing boards in whatever dark back rooms they do these things until the retroactive immunity was removed.

But no, sir, you instead decided instead to err on the side of caution, to err on the side of this misguided atrocity that currently resides at 1600 Pennsylvania Avenue to score political points with the pundits and independent voters than all who have supported you up until now.

How is it possible that you sir, who claim to once have been a "Constitutional Professor" have the audacity to verbally claim that this new bill and attachments is in any way shape or form in any way good for our nation, its people or our system of government?

How can you sir with a straight face stand there and look into those television cameras which you have come to adore so well and tell the American people that you will have your Attorney General "look into" these matters once you have been elected.

You sir and most of us American citizens know this claim for what it is. A bald faced and outright LIE. Once this administration is out of office you sir will do nothing to chase them down, investigate any of the crimes they have or are currently committing for by then the fraud that is currently in office will have by then pardoned everyone involved, skipped the country and you will have bigger fish to fry and will not want to "distract" the country with things that are already "old news".

Perhaps sir, perhaps, maybe if you spent some of the time you were doing the job you were being paid to do, in lieu of gallivanting across the nation at such a break-neck speed in an attempt to garner voters you may have missed in the primary season, perhaps sir, you might find yourself in the position to stop this cable of criminals before they place us in the position of fighting yet another war.

Perhaps sir, if your priorities did not include deciding whether or not join the "mile high club" in giving your acceptance speech at the convention indoors as opposed to outdoors, or perhaps sir finding the time to give Access Hollywood an interview as opposed to actually being on the floor of the Senate to vote on an issue that actually matters. Say for instance the cutting in funds of Medicare payments to Doctors.

Perhaps sir if you actually arrived in your office or made your presence known on the floor of the Senate you might have an influence in the abomination of the Housing bill that your friend Senator Dodd is trying to shove thru post haste. Surely on your crowded airplane you must have heard some rumors over that little item haven't you? You have heard sir, that millions of people are being foreclosed on their homes? Yet this bill, just as the one before sir does more to help out bankers, hedge funds and all of the monied people than it does to help the everyday Joe. Why is that sir?

Why is it sir that all of the members of Congress in both houses have a tendency to circle the wagons and protect the big boys while ranting and raving how they are doing this all for the sake of "main street"? It is all very reminiscent of Regan's "trickle down" economics, a study in economics that went so very well for all of us little people, but i digress and get off point forgetting he is one of those past president's you so admire.

Perhaps sir if you spent some time at you day job you would be able to offer an explanation as to why the long term unemployment has fallen more than 37 percent over the last year? Or why sir US business are filing for bankruptcy at a faster rate than ever before? Or even sir why pension funds are suffering such huge losses?

As to the high price of oil, pain at the pump, your stance/changes on so many other topics they just leave more confused than when you began.

Sadly sir I am left to decide than at this point in time although you are a very gifted and talented speaker, they are nothing more than words.

When one sits back and re-listens to your speeches after you have finished, fast forwarding and eliminating all of the screaming and applause, getting down to the basics of what you have actually said, there is really nothing there.

There is absolutely no substance in anything you have said, no proposals of how you are going to do anything you are claiming to do, much less exactly how you intend to pay for all of this. Oh it's very easy to skate by and say "there is going to be some pain". Well sir, pardon me, we are in the process of eight years of some very painful things and none of it was ever promised to us.

I have listened to all of your speeches and i am sorry to say that at this late date still have no idea actually of what you intend to do about anything positively on anything other than your grand illusion of Change.

Well sir, Change is a concept, and illusion and movement or a slogan.

The state our country is in at this very moment sir none of the above is going to help us very much and to you sir, i suggest perhaps it is time you get off the campaign trail for a couple days a week and go find out what your day job was all about.

Remember that was the place that started your endeavor and should you fail, well where you just may wind up back again.

Stimulus Checks: What have we done?

It's to late now, the damage is done, all of the checks have gone out and by now all of the money has been spent either filling up the gas tanks or paying down credit cards debt.

Not exactly what the planners of this debacle had in mind when they floated this proposal before the gulable public and congress, but yet it was quickly gobbled up as a viable solution to help "jump start" a then simply "sagging" economy. Nobody had a clue how bad it was yet to get.

No one that is except the people behind the curtain manipulating all of the strings that gyrate our economy on a daily basis. You know, the ones that are capable of bailing out a major financial entity over a weekend behind the doors scheme that ever so subtly winds up costing taxpayers a mere $30 billion. Pocket change some might say. Yet is was done " to protect the market" claim others with outright indignation when we dare to question their actions, as we should.

These same behind the curtain movers and shakers ever so slightly pulling and playing the ever so taunt strings of the economy taunt, borrowing the $150 billion to pay for this stimulus so that we lowly peons could have some relief from our daily burdens. How very kind and gracious of them to think so kindly upon us.

What else could posibly be going on behind the curtains that we mere mortals are not privilaged to see?

We now know for a fact, after the fact, that we have been spied on by our very government contrary to laws that were put in place to prevent them from doing just that. Yet now there is a quasi battle going on for our benifit on the floor of Congress to update these very same laws to "prevent" these abuse from "ever, ever" happening again.

The sticking point seems to be retroactive immunity for the telecom agencies that helped the person at 1600 do his spying. Why is this an issue? Well, it appears we are to grant immunity on an issue that we have no idea of what they were doing, why they were doing it, but the most troubeling of all is that they were doing it all well in ADVANCE OF 9/11/01. Why?

Since September 11, 2001 we have had an assault on our personal freedoms the likes never encountered in our entire history, which made it very ironic todday to sit and listen to these elected persons rant and rave today on the floor of the Senate.

Rather than taking care of business, which they had quite a bit to take care of, they instead took the time to read inane pieces of ancient history extolling the wonders of our Declaration of Independence. The very document under attack the day they are wasting time telling C-Span how wonderfull it was that it was created.

Why for heavens sake was it so important in their reading of documents to extoll the facts that the Jewish religion has been so pervasive and invasive in our politics since the 1700's. I had no idea that Apaic was around that long and had an influence over President Washington way back then, imagine that. Were they persecuting the Palestinian people back then too? Or were they just starting out as lobbyist's at that time, collecting monies to become an influential group?

Which brings us back to the stimulus checks and the unknown consequenses I fear we may have allowed to happen.

Think about a few things that have happened in the last few years for a moment: American citizens can now be arrested, taken away to undisclosed locations, unable to contact an attorney or families, labled an "enemy combatant" and detained indefinatly at the choosing of the president. We now have the patriot Acts parts one and two, the military commisssions act, a homeland security department, Northcom, a new and expanded FEMA, a continuity of government program in place, programs for and in preperation for avian flu or pandemic outbreaks, we have secret plans behind the security and prosperity programs held between the usa canada and mexico which we are told to be "harmless", the NAFTA superhighway where roads are being built, funded and supported by Spain contrary to our sovereignty. Local and state governments are so short of cash they too are "leasing" the roads to outside countries to now become toil roads for the income and the list is a mile long.

A national ID card is on the table, bio-metrics is in the works, chip implantaion is their next wet dream and we have walked into their program hook line and blindfold sinker by agreeing to and signing up for these stupid dam stimulus checks.

These masters behind the curtain pulling the strings needed an easy way to once and for all get a handle on just how many people there were in the country, exactly who they were, how much money they earned and an exact physical address for each and every physical person, their dependenents and anything else they wanted without waiting for anything as unreilable as a census to take place.

In a way it is and was a brilliant plan. Offer everyone in the country something no one would ever, ever trun down....FREE MONEY....no strings attached...no taxes paid on it....all you had to do was fill out an income tax form and we, you ever so generous government will send you a cechk for X number of dollars to help you out of this little slump.

And now the last of the check are going out, I know it's the last batch as my numbers are among the highest and sadly it has taken me this long to realize what the game has been all about.

All we can do now is sit back, watch and wait, be a lttle more prepared for marshall law when it comes, elections if they are allowed to take place vote to take each and every one of those currently in office OUT.

It is time for a new day in this country and it can only be done with a clean slate.

eboughalready